Getting Rid Of The “Gimmes”: How To Squelch Materialism In Your Child

Parenting Advice, Character Education, Teacher Resources, Moral Development and Behavior Strategies to Educate Children's Hearts and Souls

No More Misbehavin'
38 Difficult Behaviors and How to Stop Them
Dr. Michele Borba, can offer insight and a wealth of practical tips for the following topics and more.
For a review copy of the book or an interview with the author contact Anne Leedom, Net Connect Publicity, at 916.939.8246 or anne@netconnectpublicity.com

For Immediate Release

Getting Rid Of The “Gimmes”:
How To Squelch Materialism In Your Child

San Francisco, CA (February 2003)—Do your kids just have to have the latest computer game, the coolest fashions, the hottest CDs? Do they spend your money as fast as you can make it? Do they look down on other kids who don’t have the “right” clothing or possessions? If your answer is yes, it’s no surprise. Many parents buy too many “things” for their kids, out of guilt or as a substitute for time and attention.

But it’s not too late to turn the greed bus around. You can take steps to squelch your kids’ materialism—and instill in them the understanding that their moral character, contribution to society, and quality of their relationships have far more value than anything material they might acquire. Here is some timely, proven advice from consultant and educator Michele Borba on doing precisely that:

Seven Tips To Squelch Materialism:

Say no and don’t feel guilty. Always giving your kid what he wants doesn’t do him any favor. After all, you don’t always get what you want in life. So add no more often to your vocabulary, and say it to your kid without guilt. Parenting isn’t a popularity contest, and there will be lots of times your decision won’t be appreciated.

Teach prioritizing. Use your kid’s spending decisions as opportunities to teach financial planning as well as how to control urges. For instances, on holidays, birthdays, or back-to-school shopping, require your kid to make a list of desired gifts and then prioritize his requests in order of preferences. Establish clear limits as to how many gifts your kid will receive for holidays and birthdays.

Limit TV. Research has shown that the fewer commercials our kids see, the less materialistic they become. So help your kid become aware of advertisers’ marketing aims. Better yet, cut down on your kids’ TV time altogether. A study found that when kids’ TV viewing was cut by one-third, they were 70 percent less likely than their peers to ask parents for a toy the previous week.

Require giving. Begin by having your family choose a favorite cause. For example, collect blankets from neighbors for shelters; give part of a weekly allowance to needy kids; adopt an orphan through Save the Children; deliver used toys (in good condition) to the fire department. Once your family decides on a cause, commit to carrying it out.

Encourage “no purchase” gifts. Start a family tradition for birthdays or holidays that at least one present from each member must be handmade, not purchased. The gesture helps kids recognized that the best gifts are those that come straight from the heart: a letter, poem, collage, painting, drawing, or pledge to do something the recipient would enjoy—say, fixing breakfast in bed, taking out the trash or washing the car.

Share your own values. Show your kids how you value loving relationships and how moral character, service to the community, and other values transcend the materialistic world.

Praise their good qualities. Don’t forget to acknowledge your kid whenever she is generous, selfless, compromising, loving, and compassionate. Doing so helps diminish materialism.

A Behavior Makeover Plan For Parents:

What might be contributing to your kid’s materialistic streak? Among the many possibilities are an excessive allowance, overgenerous relatives, and easy parental monetary handouts. List possible sources, and then put a halt to them.

One of our biggest jobs is to help our kids learn to live independently, and that means they’ll need to learn how to manage their own money without our financial contributions. Seriously reflect on this question: “Am I raising my child to be fiscally capable?” If you have any doubts, then what will you do to help so he does? Does he need an allowance, a checking account, a budget, a savings program? Create a plan so e succeeds.

Reread the first five tips, and choose the ones you want to experiment with. Jot down your thoughts; then develop a plan.

Peers play a big part of kids’ buying urges. If you see that peer pressure is contributing to your child’s materialistic streak, teach her assertive skills to say no and counter the pressure.

Review Tips Six and Seven. How to you plan to encourage specific qualities and activities in yourself and your children that nurture strong character and spirituality and discourage materialism? Think of specific family activities that you can do together that provide service and instill identity through character and behavior. Write a plan.

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About The Author:

Michele Borba, Ed.D., has worked with more than 750,000 parents and teachers over more than two decades. A dynamic and highly sought-after speaker, she has presented hundreds of keynote addresses and workshops throughout North America, Europe, Asia, and the South Pacific on enhancing children’s character development, self-esteem, achievement, and behavior. Her down-to-earth speaking style, inspirational stories, and practical strategies appeal to audiences worldwide.

Borba is the author of eighteen books for parents and educators, including Building Moral Intelligence, selected by Amazon.com as “one of the top ten parenting books of the year,” and cited by Publisher’s Weekly as “one of the most noteworthy of 2001”; Parents Do Make a Difference, selected by Child Magazine as an “outstanding parenting book of 1999”; and Esteem Builders, used by over 1.5 million students worldwide.

Borba appears as a frequent guest expert on television and National Public Radio talk shows, including The View, Fox & Friends, The Parent Table, and The Jenny Jones Show, and has been interviewed in numerous publications, including Newsweek, Parents, Redbook, First for Women, Family Life, Working Mother, the Chicago Tribune, the Los Angeles Times, and the New York Daily News, and serves as a columnist for Oxygen Media and as honorary advisory board member for Parents magazine. Her numerous awards include the National Educator Award, presented by the National Council of Self-Esteem.

Borba and her husband were partners in a private practice for troubled children and adolescents in Campbell, California. She received her doctorate in educational psychology and counseling from the University of San Francisco, her M.A. in learning disabilities, and her B.A. from the University of Santa Clara.

To contact Borba regarding her work or her media availability, or to schedule a keynote or workshop for your organization, go to www.MicheleBorba.com or www.moralintelligence.com. Her work can also be reviewed at www.parentingbookmark.com.